another step taken...

.....finding myself in a place that I have longed to be at for such a long time. I stand amazed humbled, grateful but also afraid. I asked for this over a decade ago and received it once before. But by lack of fortitude I let go, said goodbye and paid a heavy price, both in mind and spirit. Now? I stand watching, wondering feeling unworthy of such. A simple glance, a smile and everything becomes a blur. The heart and mind remain silent as they ponder the outcome of this. They have been here before and quickly remember the greatest joy as well as the deepest pain over the years. Still all is quiet between them tonight as they enjoy the feeling, the warmth from this discovery so sweet. The outcome..Time shall tell...To make her mine indeed is my greatest desire, but that's not my choice, only my prayer. I have waited, fought my way this far and in the process found myself slowly crumbling inside. Retreating withing myself as there seemed no use to believe anymore. No person could reach me where I had hidden myself. Self imposed exile had become a familiar fate it seemed....until now. Another prayer...another chance......

another step taken...