...escape.

...winds of change. The rustling of fallen leaves, fallen memories outside my minds window. Placing my hand against the glass I feel the coldness of it all. Strange how the familiar, regardless of the feeling, always seems safer than where you are at or where you are headed. Once a cloak of loneliness and hurt, my constant companion. Now? A subtle warmth seeps inside me day by day. Wanting to soak up all that I can, not wanting to be found returning to where I came from or what I have been. Deep in an embrace, the scent of sweet discovery, powerful, intoxicating. Finding myself thinking thoughts that I am unworthy, undeserving of. To convince oneself that what is real, is whats before and waiting. Doubt, fear, hurt put so many walls, so many obstacles in our paths. Sometimes it's just easier to use them, see them as a shelter against the elements. Many nights I have thought along these lines and lived them even longer. Searching for the happiness that has eluded me all this time. Dreams bring images at eveningfall and leave me at daybreak with nothing more than a face and questions. Beckoning me to continue to find you out there somewhere. Wanting this to come to an end and seeking a solid footing but still I feel hesitant in a way. Sometimes faith is all that you have and then it is all that you need. Staying the path that's ahead. Holding a dream as long as I can, as long as is allowed. Hoping all will end with two hearts finding solace within each other, with each other.

escape...


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From a dream I had February 3, 2009. For some reason it is on my mind now more than ever...

A beautiful afternoon spent traveling around looking at the rolling countryside taking pictures. The sun begins to slip toward the horizon and I have yet to find a spot to shoot my ending images for the day. Then I remembered a perfect spot to shoot from. The warm evening air feels good blowing across the fields. As the sun goes down the nightlights began to twinkle on, you pull me off to one side and began to point out the lights of small towns several miles in the distance. You name the places now visible by eveningfall as the lights begin coming to life.... A train eases past us on a nearby track, having sneaked up on me and I complain as I am not set up for it and miss the shot. You smile at me, amused, and I cant help but laugh at myself. The train slowly moves on and fades into the darkness, its whistle announcing it has finally made it home and will rest. The stars are coming out one by one. I stand still and look at the beauty that is before me, reliving the day. I turn to you and you simply stare at me with a subtle smile, hand resting on my arm and then........

I awoke not knowing who you are...again........but now curiosity has my attention.