Wednesday, October 28, 2009

ghosts...

Went back to a place I thought I would never go back to..Had some business in the area and it was the best place to stay. Ten years ago I quite a bit of time here in this small city, happy, content and was about to move on into a normal life. Met a beautiful young woman from here and decided to move her closer and get married, thus beginning a beautiful life together. Shortly after she moved down I received a email stating she couldn't see me anymore and then she vanished. No explanation or anything. Years go by and here I am again. After I finished work today I rode the back roads. Seeing places and remembering a few. Revisited the park where we watched the river flow slowly by and planned for our future together. Stood and shot pics where we had done the same thing years ago. Seeing a ghost of my former self, younger, naive, in love. Ten years is a lot of time and things change as I have changed. While making my way to a place I wanted to photograph this evening, I glanced at a passing road sign and remembered that it was the road her mother lived on. I slammed on brakes and sat there..Wondering, thinking..Should I? Well I backed up and made the turn and drove towards her home. I wasn't sure if I was going to stop or not. I really didn't feel nervous or have any sense of foreboding. As I approached the home I could see the unkempt yard and the vacant house with a "for sale" sign out front. There was my answer..that I wasn't going to get one..

As I said, it was a long time ago. But it was the one event in my life that I still have no answer for. I know, forget about it. Probably never will. Somehow I feel something deep inside changed today....closure, or at least as close as I can get...let the ghost finally rest and rest in peace..

No comments: