....it's long hard road

...starting to feel more comfortable in my own skin. This is probably due to me growing a thicker skin and becoming somewhat withdrawn and maybe even a little colder on the inside. Expecting nothing more than what I have endured over the last decade. So as memories pass my way and smiles grace my presence I hold out no hope, yet it still remains for some reason. Subdued and buried, yet it remains. So with each step wonder and curiosity but so much seems to remind me of what has been left behind. Going in circles? Probably not as its far too easy to recognize the landmarks of lessons learned and relearned. Dreams of late send mixed messages, the heart and mind still refuse to speak to me as they haven't healed fully. Concentrating on each step leaves me little time to enjoy the scenery passing me by. Maybe my lot in life is down a totally different path and I am blind to this....regardless... ...it's a long hard road.